High School Sweethearts
I began dating Ryan Walker when I was a freshman in high school. We weren’t the type of giddy teenage couple to discuss our future together ,but Ryan knew that one day, regardless of who his future “baby momma” was, he would have a son who would bear the most important name the galaxy has ever known. I didn’t really have it in my mind that I would ever be his wife, so I fully supported his enthusiasm. I encouraged him to select such a name one day! After all, we were 14 and 15 years old with so much learning and growing to do. I was more of a realistic person as opposed to the day-dreamer. I always thought our story was the perfect adolescent romance and we’d go off to separate colleges, meet new people and start lives as grown ups, leaving the high school memories behind us. Well my reality was a little different. We dated all throughout high-school, studied at neighboring universities, started talking about a future together, things went south and we broke up. The end.
Ryan and I going to his senior prom 2004
Not really, after a long and bumpy road of self discovery and practicing independence, Ryan and I met back up for dinner before my 24th birthday. I shared an evening with someone I felt I knew my whole life, but still had a lot to learn about. I sat across the table from the same hilarious and smart boy I met in high school, but there was this new man who was more mature, more assured and more loving, than the person I had parted ways with during college. I had done some growing up and learning of life lessons myself, but I too was still the same quirky girl he had once dated. I can’t really say we picked up where we left off, because where we began our “new” relationship was in a place of love and respect and a mutual understanding that we are imperfect humans who have the potential to make one another better. It was a great new chapter for our story.
Here we are, 30 and 31 years old. I have known Ryan Walker for more than half of my life, and I have now happily been Mrs. Walker for almost three years. We have one sweet and curious daughter named Evelyn “Evie” (eh-vee) Paige Walker, and a little boy on the way in May. Which brings me back to the first paragraph; stay with me, this long story has a point! I am now the “baby momma” who is having Ryan’s son, and Ryan still feels strongly about naming his son as he originally planned 16 years ago.
Start Here if You want to Cut to the Chase
You see, my husband has always wanted to name his son “Luke Sky Walker” and that is not a joke! Did I mention my due date is May 4th as in MAY THE FORTH BE WITH YOU! Ryan is convinced this is an omen. This is OUR son, however, and while Luke is a nice name, put the three names together and I would be the mother of a future Jedi. Not just any Jedi, but the most powerful Jedi of all time*. All joking aside, this would be our son’s real name. His entire upbringing would revolve around the fact that his parents really named him after the most popular sci-fi franchise of all time. He could either really love it or hate it (and us).
So what is a couple to do when they cannot seem to agree on a name for their child?
Isn’t that what marriage is all about anyhow? I haven’t said “yes” to Luke just yet, but I am open to Lukas, which is a nice German name. (Shout-out Deutschland).
2. Openly communicate your thoughts and concerns with each other:
I have expressed my concerns about our son having a name that clearly is meant to be funny. Ryan has shared his belief that he can share his middle name or simply be Luke/Lukas Walker and omit his middle name if he doesn’t like the attention.
3. Present Solutions:
Not much gets solved if one person just complains about the name but never offers solutions. Ryan and I both made a list of our top 5 names and compared them. 3 of his 5 names were worse ( I think he did that on purpose) and he hated 2 of my names, but we found that we both loved the name “Nolan”!
4. Try to push all (ok most) selfishness aside:
I am working hard to look at this scenario with an open heart and open mind and consider that this is something Ryan has talked about since he was younger. Just like you’d encourage someone to pursue a life long dream/goal, you don’t want to take away someones dream name. I didn’t have my wedding planned before we were married, but had I been the bride who dreamed up every wedding detail as a child, I’d hope my husband would support my planning. With realistic parameters of course.
5. Don’t include others in your decision:
I am not saying you shouldn’t talk to anyone else about names, of course you can get excited with your mom and sister about cute baby names; but don’t use others to take sides. With this blog post alone, I’m openly asking for your opinion, but at the end of the day, it will still come down to what Ryan and I decide. I can however be bought if Lucas Films and Disney want to pay for Luke Sky Walker’s future college expenses. We can work out a deal lol!
This process should be fun and happy. We’re having a baby! This is a reason to celebrate, so if choosing a name becomes stressful or a topic of argument, take a step back and focus on other things. You have time to chose a name, even if that means naming him after he arrives. If you still can’t agree after seeing your little bundle, maybe it’s time to pick out of a hat! Try the Name Hunter by Nameberry for fun.
So you tell me, would you consider naming your child Lukas Sky Walker? Did you and your husband have any difficulties agreeing on a name?
May the Force be with Us!